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Day 44: This is why everyone is not doing it.

I was going to write about something else but 3 things happened:

  1. Ayaz left another thought-provoking comment.( I have to start giving out stars!)

  2. I went on an unexpected trip. such a treat during quarantine!

  3. I connected multiple dots to come up with a new realization (of very old truths)

So we will be coming to Day 42.

Why is everyone already not doing it?

Already being rich and happy and anything else.

Let's begin.

Couple of excerpts from Ayaz.

"What I mean by this is that it's not so easy to simply go and do something, even if the resources are there."

"The other part of this is that people's desires and risk tolerances change throughout their lives."

"So while someone may be interested in some very ambitious idea, they may also not be interested in the risk of leaving a context they are happy with for an unclear future"

Very good stuff.

The initial confusion of "Why is everyone not doing it?" is growing into a series of thoughtful questions that help us understand why that is.

Understanding the reasons behind this "phenomenon" will arm us with insight that will help those of us who do want to get what they want.

Today I was riding in a car with a friend of my dad's. He was telling me about his life, emigrating to the US from Uzbekistan, getting into IT, American friends, getting a daughter, and boom 20 years later here we are in the car.

Later at the dinner he actually gave me very insightful comments on specifically eCommerce trends, reflecting back on the hustling with my dad during "hard n hungry Soviet 90s".

getting stuff looked like that (No, they are not in a line for a Supreme shirt)

Note: "regular" people, aka users, give you sooooo much information. Just getting them talking gives you unprecedented access to the brains of the consumers/guests/customers.

So I asked myself.

"If this person knows way more than I do and has an entrepreneurial edge to him, why is he still working his job 9 to 5 and unable to travel as much as he wants?"

He told me exactly why.

He already lives a comfortable life that is hard for him to risk. Ahh, getting to Ayaz's comment.

So it's not that eCommerce (that's purely my example, but I think there is an "entrepreneurial" way of doing almost everything) is too risky, impossible to do, oversaturated, shady (whatever arguments people are dissuading you with). Those are factors but not as strong as the lack of readiness to leave your current situation.

Again, this seems so simple.

But actually hearing it from a real person made me realize that these roadblocks to success are real, tangible. This is the power of internalization. You can look and feel what it is like. You can analyze it and then be able to recognize when you stumble upon the same things.

I do not mean to criticize or judge anyone. I am merely making observations.

I still think many many people have a shot at many things they are claiming not to.

But this is the thing. As Ayaz said, it is because they are not ready to take the risk (which is oftentimes soooooo overrated). So as we talked in Day 42, it is not the information or resources that is the problem but our attitude.

That is why I wrote about fostering the mindset of "You can get what you want and if you don't, it is your fault."

More interactions with real people.

I had to open a bank account. We drive down to the bank and I have to sit through 40 minutes of document work. At least the banker was talkative.

He was telling me about him having an importing business with Costa Rica back before the recession. 2008, daughter born and boom here we are in a dreadfully dull Suntrust office for the past 10 years.

Of course, there are reasons. There is responsibility for the family. So again, we just want to evaluate this situation and really feel it.

When I am talking about pursuing things its because unhappiness and unfulfillment, old age, death are real fucking things.

They seem so far away, especially for young people. But when you are looking right at the person who tells you that he hated the last 10 years of his life, right motivations hopefully fall in place.

Like you have to feel how unhappy you can be potentially to develop a crazy drive towards a "happy" life. Why? Because most likely that "happy" life will take a lot of hard work, maybe lonely nights, tears, doubts, desire to just settle and be comfortable, rejections, confusion.

To build something truly great, whatever that is for us, we need a lot of disdain towards a version of ourselves we could be (based on observations from real life) and a lot of affinity towards our Plan A.

We are talking about the most valuable thing we have: our life.

Those men I talked to were once young and free, careless, and probably not suspecting that although life is not tragic, it wears you out if your don't consciously build a certain scheme of the world and yourself.

Attitude towards things is everything.

That's why this blog is dedicated purely to mindsets.

The biggest point is to fully internalize it and feel it. Because this is the exact time when we need to be strong and persistent. Once you are on the "other side", owning whatever you want to own, having leverage, we will be playing another game, already having the self-confidence. That time will have its own struggles but not the one of having the persistence to attempt living a better life until you make it.

Like now, I am:

  • still broke af= not having personal proof of ecom making money for self-validation

  • held by a very shaky F1 that is being violated = putting myself at more risk of not being employed in the US and thus being kicked out

  • away from home and family = missing emotional support

  • don't have an internship or research (thank god because I want to fully own my time ) = missing social validation

  • single = even less emotional support or validation

All of this to demonstrate the importance of mindset.

This is the time to be strong.

We have to win the mental game before we enter other types of games (or simultaneously).

Because rightfully it is not that multiple other people do not have amazing ideas or access to resources.

They just got stuck.

They also chose to be fine with it.

🗣Watch, observe, converse with real people out there: of different ages and statuses to paint a mental map of various lives and things that didn't work. Arm yourself with these insights to make it work for yourself.

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