This is a longer one, but dense and very important.
So recently I got a message persuading me to stay away from all this foolishness I am busy with right now and go back to a traditional path. I want to elaborate on one idea that was brought up that I find extremely problematic and dangerous.
Here is the exact quote.
"The path you appear to be on might have worked for Bill Gates, and a few others, but almost no one else."
Now, the moment I read it, I felt a little proud. I was like "I know I am going to be successful. Look at me on my entrepreneurial journey getting this iconic message trying to dissuade me. Wow, I at least made it here."
I took a screenshot.
I didn't take it seriously because well we have all heard this phrase a million times. You are not that so don't do that thing.
Then I happened to think about it more. I actually thought of this question.
Why is this analogy of "You are not Bill Gates/Zuckerberg?" used so so often?
What is that person actually trying to tell me by using this overused analogy?
I guess it is something like:
"You might think a lot of yourself, possessing illusory superiority, but in reality, you cannot sustainably rely on the same level of intelligence, creativity, leverage, and luck to make you as achieved as Bill Gates."
Firstly, this question uses an old example. Bill Gates is very achieved and admired. But since those times, there have emerged a lot of entrepreneurs who were in a different position.
Secondly, it is using an extreme example of a billionaire to dissuade me from the smallest action on a scale of getting there. Like, he is saying you cannot become a billionaire, so don't even try to do anything, like even becoming a rich person in possession of your time and freedom.
It is almost like saying, "Hey, you are not going to be a Usain Bolt, so do not even attempt running."
This analogy right there demonstrates the crux of the question.
Maybe I am not as intelligent as Bill Gates was or is. Maybe I do not have the same leverage as a guy coming from a well-off American family able to support him somehow at least. Maybe I will not have the same luck. So theoretically my cap for achievement is lower.
However, this is not a reason for not trying to grow at least to that cap and then expanding beyond your cap.
This is a limiting belief.
Telling yourself that because you cannot become the best, you should not even step on it.
There is an additional nuance here.
This argument could work potentially if I was trying to become the CEO of Microsoft. Then saying you are not Bill Gates makes sense. Because that spot is already taken. That specific niche is captured.
But we are talking about the widest niche possible; the planet earth with its people. There are many many opportunities and new niches where I actually can become the best, or so-called Bill Gates. So Bill Gates is used as a single example to cover a huge area.
Lastly, I was just wondering why this person threw this question at me instead of suggesting ways of becoming a "Bill Gates" in some area: becoming the best version of yourself and eventually well-known for that something, that being even just being yourself.
It made me think of more examples in my own life.
I was told: "You are not Van Gogh, you shouldn't be an artist. "
"You are not Plisentskaya(Russian ballerina), you shouldn't pursue dance."
Although I am eradicating limiting beliefs, I of course want to remain reasonable. Maybe those people are communicating something like: "Your level of ability in this field is not good enough for me to believe that you can reach the mastery level."
Firstly, skills can be developed and grown. But okay, there are natural inclinations that will put some people significantly apart from others so you don't want to jump into that red ocean.
But the way people choose to say it is very daunting for kids. It left me extremely distressed as a child. It would make me really really sad.
Instead, when I want to tell my kids something, I would go like: "You do not need to even worry about becoming X/Y/Z. We are gonna make you your own unique Mariyam"
Telling someone you cannot become Bill Gates is daunting, it sounds like an unpleasant challenge with a lot of negative emotions.
A person who wrote to me was my teacher once.
That is why choosing your teachers carefully is very important.
Working with resources and intaking from the ones that are not feeding these false ideas into you making you stay in a shell.
Step 1:
👆Whenever you are posed with this statement, overcome the initial burst of emotions (it will be there, at least in the beginning), to critically examine this question. What is the person actually telling you? Does their argument actually make sense? Are they actually giving you an insight or simply reciting memes they heard before?
Step 2:
✌️Now, you want to be fully open to all the stuff that comes your way and not living in a castle of your own ideas. I want to see critical comments, comments from people who appreciate my stuff, and also people who completely disagree with me and think I am completely wrong. All of that is giving me information to work with. From there I can decide what is good and what I will not use.
Step 3.
🤟Get your mindsets from "Navals". Here is a relevant excerpt from this podcast:
Best of all, I can take such quotes and examine them here, instigating a discussion and more thinking on this topic from you guys. 👌
Like the IG post below if you have heard this statement in your life.
Cheers,
Mariyam